New place stuff continues. I'm neck deep in the various paperwork stuff I have to do. There is so much! And because I am attempting to close the end of the month, everything is very rushed. Today I have to go print something out, fill it out and rush it over to a business so they can start doing their thing. It's tiring. But I feel like I am making progress.
Renovations on my current place also continue. I was shocked at how much difference painting my kitchen cabinets white made. Really brightens everything up! I've decided to have professionals paint my place rather than trying to do it myself. I just don't have the time or the expertise. But it's all coming along. It'd be nice to put the place on the market before I move.
It's really been mostly all real estate, all the time here in opalescent-land.
I did have one interesting realization recently. I've been mulling over what to do, if anything, with SW. We are current FWBs. I've been worried about getting too emotionally attached to him, and wanting or expecting more than he could give me. He's been really clear that this isn't a romantic connection for him. And I have this unfortunate tendency to want to 'level up' relationships into romantic ones that I really probably shouldn't have. Oak and Willow were definitely in that category. I was thinking about ending the sexual connection with SW. I told him that I was thinking about that. It didn't seem fair to not give him a heads up where my mind was at. So I waffled back and forth on it for while.
Recently I had a date with SW. We haven't had sex in about a month for various reasons. There has also been a lot of life stuff going on for both of us. I'm moving, he's exploring some career options, etc. He got a job offer - it's great opportunity and he's going to accept it. The job has a lot of travel. He'd be out of town most of every month. When he confirmed that he was almost certainly going to take the offer, something in my brain relaxed. It was rather odd. My brain moved him from the 'maybe romantic potential' to 'not available'. I need a romantic partner to be around more than once a month. It's not optional for me. But a FWB? That's not a problem. I might wish to see him more often but I don't need or expect to. Suddenly the concerns I had about this relationship - wanting more, not going to get more, emotional entanglements, expectations - were not relevant. He's just not available in the way I need. Which I already knew. But for some reason, having it framed as he is literally going to be physically absent a lot, made me finally accept that.
I'm pretty happy my brain finally accepted reality. This is not always my strong suit.
I love how that man touches me. It's interesting to me that we are more sexually compatible now than when we first dated, several years ago. I think we both know what we like more now than then.
I waffled because the sex is really good. I would have if it got too emotionally damaging for me. But now I get to have my cake and eat it too!