Poly Vignettes: Sharing Success & Happiness

I would just say that the three of you have to decide what works best for you as a team. Communication is really important in polyamory, and kids is one of the areas where it's especially important.

One other bit of food for thought: Not everyone comes out to their friends and family as poly, some people just "stay in the closet" indefinitely. I'm not saying you should keep it a secret, just suggesting don't feel rushed about it. You can tell people when you feel that the timing is right.

It's wonderful to hear that the three of you get along well!
 
kdt26417 said:
One other bit of food for thought: Not everyone comes out to their friends and family as poly, some people just "stay in the closet" indefinitely. I'm not saying you should keep it a secret, just suggesting don't feel rushed about it. You can tell people when you feel that the timing is right.
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I know that sometimes happens, and I will say we for now have kept it as secret for the most part, although a see through secret that is very easy to find out if you want to :rolleyes: But especially, keeping it a secret if he should move here or/and we should have kids, is not an option we would ever consider. I would never ask a child to lie. I don't want to be like mye aunt, who only told the family about her new boyfriend after she was already pregant with his child, that is pushing timing a bit too far :cool:
 
My metamour had problems with her bf today, so she left him and her husband doing chores and called me to vent. I love that even when things are going wrong we have each other's backs. All of us. <3
 
I have a great positive true story. One night my wife invited her best girlfriend into our bed. We were together for 38 years without a single problem, even after our g/f got married. There was absolutely no jealousy or competition. The ladies had sex with each other but never without me present for some reason. They would say that it was no fun without me. I was their focus and that made me feel great. In return, I made their lives easy and denied them nothing. I made sure they both felt loved and proved it over and over again and I am not talking about just sex.

It can work when the right mix of people get together. We were only told that our girlfriend had an arrangement with her husband and she wanted to keep her two relationships separate. We honored that request but did socialize with her husband on occasion. He once brought his wife to Las Vegas and left her with us as he went off on his own. Real strange but we never thought anything of it. It worked for all four of us and worked well. We all got something we needed out of it and something like what we had is hard to obtain, even if we tried again.
 
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Just back from spending a long weekend with my BFF and her husband at their house. It was my first time there since all of this began, and I think all of us were curious how it would go, especially around their kids. The answer is, of course, that it went great. Time with all of us (inc. kids) was easy, time with just her was easy, time with just him was fantastic, and then he and I had the kids while she went out with her bf, and even that was fine. We flowed easily with the inevitable schedule changes, and everything worked out really well.

Next month he comes to my house, and we do it all in reverse (well, fewer people live in my house, so it will be less complicated) and I'm really looking forward to it.
 
A2Poly said:
Just back from spending a long weekend with my BFF and her husband at their house. It was my first time there since all of this began, and I think all of us were curious how it would go, especially around their kids. The answer is, of course, that it went great. Time with all of us (inc. kids) was easy, time with just her was easy, time with just him was fantastic, and then he and I had the kids while she went out with her bf, and even that was fine. We flowed easily with the inevitable schedule changes, and everything worked out really well.

Next month he comes to my house, and we do it all in reverse (well, fewer people live in my house, so it will be less complicated) and I'm really looking forward to it.
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Sounds lovely!
 
I just found this thread - it's lovely.

I want to gush about the best Thanksgiving I've ever had (a week ago today). Instead of fighting with family members about politics and being subjected to football, I went to my boyfriend's house and spent the holiday with him, his wife, one of his wife's girlfriends, their good friend, and one of her boyfriends. It was a beautiful day of poly friends and lovers. The food was pretty amazing, too.

I am new to poly, but this group of people has really made it easy for me to assimilate. There is so much openness, love, and acceptance.
 
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In the last three weeks Mal spent most of a week at my house, and Djinn and I spent most of a week in Vegas. Both where (so very) needed. And so very amazing in different ways. It was easy to get caught up in the drama that happened last month, but all that time with each of them separately really cemented what all of our intentions are for the future. The fear and anxiety is almost completely gone. I love them both (differently), and it was so great to spend the time assuring them of that and being reassured about their (individual) love for me.
 
It's so nice to read these stories and remind myself that there's a wonderful happy part of poly if you can just work through it. Thanks to everyone here for sharing, especially the years of posts from Mono and Redpepper and their intentional family. It's an inspiration to see these happy relationships form and go on for years and years.
 
I had to run out of state unexpectedly yesterday, and both my guys rose to the occasion - coordinating schedules and cars and making sure my son will be able to get to and from work. I Am crazy stressed about my dad being in the hospital, but I have no anxiousness at all at home because I know they have it handled. Love my poly life!
 
Now that's teamwork!

I need a moment to shout from the roof tops. My husband and I recently bought a house and my polylover and his wife could not have been more awesome and helpful. This past weekend, my husband and lover were pictures of amazingness while they set up the kids' trampoline and did other "manly" duties, while his wife, one of my closest friends, helped me pick out and set up everything in our new home. Everything about this poly relationship has brought my husband and me closer together. I love this amazing poly experience and feeling so circled in love and support. I hope everyone gets to feel this way at least once in their polylife.
 
My metamour bought me a pimp cat shirt. :)
 
My local lover and my long-distance lover texted with each other to arrange our arrival back to my town after a vacation, because my phone was dead and I was driving. When my long-distance lover and I arrived at my local lover's house, he was waiting there with his metamour's favorite drinks and a homemade vegan burrito for him. Then they kissed each other purely to entertain me, since they are both mostly straight. I really felt like the luckiest girl in the world at that moment.
 
I think I have a "wife"

Hi!

I mostly lurk here, but am coming out of lurkdom to tell you this :)

This is my little happy story for the day.

When I was married, my husband expected me to do all the domestic duties. ALL of them. I used to say to him, Wow, I wish I had a wife! Why don't I have somebody to iron my clothes, do my laundry, make my meals, do the dishes, etc. (I worked outside the home, too, by the way) This was a HUGE source of contention between us, and one of the many, many reasons we are now divorced.

Anyway, I was telling this story to my Master's girlfriend one weekend that I was spending with them. She laughed, but could totally relate. She used to feel the same way when she was married!

It is so very different from our marriages when we (Master, his girlfriend and me) are all together in the house, and it seems as if things are naturally falling into place. I LOVE to cook, but HATE dishes. She'd rather do the dishes than cook. So I do all the cooking when I'm with them and she and Master do the dishes. She HATES cleaning toilets. I would much rather clean toilets than do dishes. So I clean them. We all share the laundry and other household duties.
And on top of all that, we get to be friends.

I was standing in the kitchen one day, making dinner for us, and I realized that that little dream of having a wife back when I used to get so tired of doing IT ALL has come true. Someone to share duties with and be friends with, too.

So she is now my "wife", who does for me. And I'm her "wife" who does for her.
 
I found out that Jack has been planning to surprise me for my birthday by showing up on my doorstep. And he and Roger were texting each other to plan everything out! Of course I ruined the surprise by directly asking Jack to come visit me (whoops! :rolleyes:), but the fact that they get along so well and were trying to make my birthday special just makes me so smiley! I love them both so much! :D
 
Just wanted to say this makes me very very happy. My hubby's GF just moved in w/ us a couple of weeks ago and we all get closer every day. You guys are the goal for us, and it's already starting to happen! It's amazing how we are already fitting into each other's lives. Hopeing for more good every day!

claire2 said:
Hi!

I mostly lurk here, but am coming out of lurkdom to tell you this :)

This is my little happy story for the day.

When I was married, my husband expected me to do all the domestic duties. ALL of them. I used to say to him, Wow, I wish I had a wife! Why don't I have somebody to iron my clothes, do my laundry, make my meals, do the dishes, etc. (I worked outside the home, too, by the way) This was a HUGE source of contention between us, and one of the many, many reasons we are now divorced.

Anyway, I was telling this story to my Master's girlfriend one weekend that I was spending with them. She laughed, but could totally relate. She used to feel the same way when she was married!

It is so very different from our marriages when we (Master, his girlfriend and me) are all together in the house, and it seems as if things are naturally falling into place. I LOVE to cook, but HATE dishes. She'd rather do the dishes than cook. So I do all the cooking when I'm with them and she and Master do the dishes. She HATES cleaning toilets. I would much rather clean toilets than do dishes. So I clean them. We all share the laundry and other household duties.
And on top of all that, we get to be friends.

I was standing in the kitchen one day, making dinner for us, and I realized that that little dream of having a wife back when I used to get so tired of doing IT ALL has come true. Someone to share duties with and be friends with, too.

So she is now my "wife", who does for me. And I'm her "wife" who does for her.
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claire2 said:
Hi!

I mostly lurk here, but am coming out of lurkdom to tell you this :)

This is my little happy story for the day.

When I was married, my husband expected me to do all the domestic duties. ALL of them. I used to say to him, Wow, I wish I had a wife! Why don't I have somebody to iron my clothes, do my laundry, make my meals, do the dishes, etc. (I worked outside the home, too, by the way) This was a HUGE source of contention between us, and one of the many, many reasons we are now divorced.

Anyway, I was telling this story to my Master's girlfriend one weekend that I was spending with them. She laughed, but could totally relate. She used to feel the same way when she was married!

It is so very different from our marriages when we (Master, his girlfriend and me) are all together in the house, and it seems as if things are naturally falling into place. I LOVE to cook, but HATE dishes. She'd rather do the dishes than cook. So I do all the cooking when I'm with them and she and Master do the dishes. She HATES cleaning toilets. I would much rather clean toilets than do dishes. So I clean them. We all share the laundry and other household duties.
And on top of all that, we get to be friends.

I was standing in the kitchen one day, making dinner for us, and I realized that that little dream of having a wife back when I used to get so tired of doing IT ALL has come true. Someone to share duties with and be friends with, too.

So she is now my "wife", who does for me. And I'm her "wife" who does for her.
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I enjoyed reading this :) All the best to you and I hope your happiness continues!
 
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