Nyc-That is awesome! A long time coming! Very happy for you!
I'm doing great. I am chilling out in Sunny California with my youngest (7) visiting friends. It's been in the 100's F all week, which is a little hotter than I prefer, but the sunshine is WORTH the heat.

LOVING LOVING LOVING the sunshine.
GG had a mental breakthrough and it's shown in his behavior. The day after I left, my oldest started bleeding (she's 4 months pregnant) and had to go to the hospital. Baby is fine, they got things under control, told her stress needs reduced. Unfortunately, she's severe ADD, with severe depression and anxiety none of which can be medicated for while she's pregnant because the drugs aren't safe for the baby. So reducing the stress is pretty much impossible without isolation. So-she's isolating herself from everyone, which most difficultly is her husband, 3 yo and 1 yo son.
At any rate, with no one else suggesting it, GG checked on her and then got dinner for the family and took it over to their house for them. THIS is the GG I missed. The one who didn't need to be told to be caring and considerate and helpful to family. I made a point of letting him know that A) I noticed and
B) THIS self-motivated action is one of the things I have been talking about as "missing".
Just before I left my mp3 player went missing. Like-literally hours before. It "reappeared" after I left (and posted on my fb about it). In a place where it ABSOLUTELY was not at when I left (no questions there) and where it is OBVIOUS someone set it to "return" it to me. Meaning-someone "borrowed" it without asking. NICE-gotta love that.
The only person who could have; denies it.
But-GG was the one who was still home when it reappeared, he had continued to look for it knowing it was upsetting for me to have it missing and then confronted the person it had to have been (Confrontation NOT being his strong point).
Again-I let him know I noticed, expressed my appreciation and commended him for being self-motivated to handle what needed handled.
We had a tiny set back last night going over bills. When he asked me "how much is xyz check" and I responded "I don't know. I ALREADY told you before I left, I left a blank check for XXX so that she can reserve the hotel. I need YOU to fill it in when she knows the amount and then write it on the bill list for me". Followed by "sigh".
He replied; "CRAP, I'm sorry, I wasn't paying attention just now. I was trying to multitask-that doesn't work. I have stopped. I got it. You did tell me."
He then finished what we were working on while being attentive and we went on with the evening.
I understand; retraining himself is going to take time. I can handle that. I couldn't handle the complete lack of effort to do it at all. I'm happy to see that something is happening.
Maca and I are doing great in terms of our relationship. Hate being apart so much. Hate having to travel back and forth to see each other. But on a personal level, doing great.
He's noted numerous times how much better we are doing since we stopped trying to "protect" each others feelings by NOT saying whatever was true. Not that we blab off heartless shit. We still hold ourselves accountable for saying things in considerate ways. But we don't hold back information just because we know it will make the other person uncomfortable.
I feel a lot better about the place we are at. I feel happy about the progress we've made and the way things are going today and the plans for tomorrow. All good.
The oldest kid is bringing us grandbaby 3.
The next one has graduated, has a full time job and is rebuilding his relationship with Maca.
The next one has about a year to go and is keeping in touch with me regularly and going to get to see the 4th kiddo in a few weeks for the first time in 4 years (he's our godson and it's a long story)-which they are both excited about because they were attached at the hip for years.
The 14 year old has found girls, but he's staying on top of his schooling and he's doing side jobs to make money. He's enjoying an extra level of freedom this year, but he's being responsible with it. So as much as I want to cling to him, I'm not. Thankfully, he is a love-bug and he is making a point of giving me extra hugs and affection when we are in the same town.

I've noticed him being extra affectionate with his baby sister too. LOL. I don't think he is going to admit it, but he obviously misses her.
The baby (7)is reveling in her alone time with me. Something she has never cared about. She's enjoyed being the "big girl" and helping me while we travel. She and I have made multiple trips since May and she's quite the experienced packer and traveler. It's awesome watching her come into her own finally.
The oldest grandson (Peanut) is so sweet! He's having a hard time with Grammy leaving so much. He talks to me every couple days while I'm gone and tracks exactly where I am and what I am doing. When I'm home he's at my house in a split second verifying that everything is still there and hugging me and loving on me. When I leave, there's tears and lots of reassurance that I will call and be home soon.
The youngest grandson (Coconut) is walking and starting to talk.

As soon as I return he climbs right into my arms-every time while mommy is telling me "he's not being people friendly he probably won't want to be held" lol. Lays his head on my shoulder and cuddles up close humming and patting my face until I sing to him. Then he just lays on my shoulder smiling while I dance and sing with him.
When his brother is crying and being clingy before I leave, he gets clingy (no tears) and wants to hold onto me too. It's cute-because I can tell he's just gauging what he should do based on what his older brother is doing. He watches him like a hawk!
