The "How Are You Doing" Thread (redux)

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I'm feeling incredibly anxious today. Not all of it makes sense, so I'm just trying to take control of the things I can take control of and I took anti-anxiety meds for only the second time in several months to see if they will help. I got together with one of my friends over the weekend and we end up not using a condom in the middle of the night. Suddenly I was worried that we weren't okay, so I reached out to him and asked if we were and he said yes, we're good. The anxiety med kicked in and now I feel a little stoned, which could be a good thing, given how bored I am at work. :)
 
Well, I think I need to keep my mouth shut about poly going forwards. Whilst I firmly believe in its benefits, and that it is a viable relationship choice for the right people, - so many people have said I need therapy, Im getting tired of it now. I also think , at 54, I have no hope of meeting any poly women, so i am going to keep my mouth shut ! Ive had 14 years practice of shutting up in my broken marriage, so here goes ....

Wish me luck !
 
bassman said:
Well, I think I need to keep my mouth shut about poly going forwards. Whilst I firmly believe in its benefits, and that it is a viable relationship choice for the right people, - so many people have said I need therapy, Im getting tired of it now. I also think , at 54, I have no hope of meeting any poly women, so i am going to keep my mouth shut ! Ive had 14 years practice of shutting up in my broken marriage, so here goes ....

Wish me luck !
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For now, just date and be yourself! No one thinks twice if a single man dates multiple women, especially so recently after a divorce. Look in different places - kinda like don't go looking for an agnostic at a church picnic. There are certain people I don't bring up poly or even homosexuality with because I already know how they will react. Took me two years to find a group of friends that were poly friendly. Truth be told I was a bit surprised, but I shouldn't have been. My goal was actually to just find a new, more open minded group to call friends. Three years later I have a great group of friends I consider family. However, now that the option is open, still no one to date yet, not that I'm putting any effort to looking LOL.

When they tell you that you need therapy - "I might just take you up on that, I can't for the life of me figure out how to deal with so many closed minded bigoted people."
 
I rarely, if ever, bring up the concept or topic of polyamory in the dating process. I go on a few dates with someone and, if it looks like we're clicking and want to keep seeing each other, then I talk about exclusivity and non-exclusivity. Never do I use the word "polyamory" because it confuses people.

Also, bassman, I am a woman the same age as you. We are out there.
 
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nycindie said:
Feeling turned on and excited about new possibilities right now.
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:D This is great to read.

Well, I think I need to keep my mouth shut about poly going forwards. Whilst I firmly believe in its benefits, and that it is a viable relationship choice for the right people, - so many people have said I need therapy, Im getting tired of it now.
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Or maybe you could use it as a filtering device when looking for new friends?

The people I'm close to couldn't care less if I chose to have a boyfriend with 5 other girlfriends, have 5 partners myself, turn up with a girlfriend after always having had boyfriends in the past or be single and celibate. They might check that I was happy with what was going on but beyond that, they wouldn't care. Why would they?

Even fairly casual acquaintances and my work colleagues wouldn't care. So long as I carried on doing whatever it is that they expect me to do, it wouldn't matter how I chose to structure my romantic life.
 
I'm happy its my day off, looking forward to cooking dinner.

I've had enough of winter. Actually, I had enough of it weeks ago.. the day after I was hoping for a snow storm to come and cancel a meeting I had and ended up getting my wish.

Worried about my mom (she needs to move into an assisted living facility but can't afford it) but I'm trying to focus on the positive details of that whole situation.

I hate when I get an anime theme song stuck in my head because I don't speak Japanese, so I end up humming or hearing garbled words in my head cause I don't know how to pronounce the lyrics.

Pleased that I found this forum, feel sort of out of place since some of these threads have so much content and I'm also not used to this type of communication. I've managed to unfortunately bring my feelings of social awkwardness along, but since I'm not exactly the type to "chat" or look for advice, I'm ok with reading and contributing where I feel I can.

I'm happy that a lot of you here seem quite intelligent and pleasant : )
 
SNeacail said:
When they tell you that you need therapy - "I might just take you up on that, I can't for the life of me figure out how to deal with so many closed minded bigoted people."
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lol, I love it.
Well the thing is, Im in a break up and many people ask me what happened, and I guess I can easily conceal that it started as a V. I will try that from now.
 
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Feeling stressed about medical issues. I have some surgery coming up, and I've never had any before and it's making me stressy and uneasy in my skin.

And I'm concerned about Mal and Djinn's financial situation. I feel bad that things are eazy for me and so hard for them. They work so hard for everything and can't catch a break. I know it isn't my problem to solve, but it just seems so unfair, and I wish there was some way I could help.
 
Not feeling great, physically. My stomach has been very sensitive the last couple of days and I've been feeling some nausea. Normally I would've worked today, but my job was closed due to the snowstorm, so I slept all day today and hardly ate anything.

Had a brief texting exchange with Cafe Guy last night. I think he's depressed.

I have not heard from December Guy since our dinner date a week and a half ago. I texted him a thank-you the next day, saying I am looking forward to seeing him again (because he mentioned wanting to when we were parting after dinner), and then I sent a text when the snowstorm was raging to say I hoped he was safe and warm. Nothing. I know he is very busy with extremely demanding work but... ??? He met me mid-December, said he would call but didn't, and the only reason we got together last week was because I contacted him and asked him out -- I think I will give him a call tomorrow and see what's what. I mean, a week and a half isn't all that long, but it is surprising after all the enthusiastic making out we did!
 
Had a visit with the friend Im in love with today, havent seen them for 4mo or so. Shes so beautiful. She has a boy at school that follows her everywhere and they get along really well. Shes gonna be in school for a long while so I think its great she found a good friend and he sounds adorable : )

It was so nice to be around her, hear her voice, see that gorgeous smile and talk together without having to type on a phone!

I kissed her forehead twice today, I owed her one from last time cause I was too chicken. She says I owe her 3 next time ; )

I wish her partner didnt hate me. I respect that she cant help it though, I understand why I seem a threat. I cant help having an emotional relationship, we had that connection before her gf came around.
 
Well, im going to meet a lady from a dating site, for coffee. My mind can only see my lost love, i want her back. But i am forcing myself to get out and meet people.
 
Yeah, I think that is a smart way to go. A chance to get out of your head, so to speak.
 
I shall refrain from physically hurting my MIL. My years of trying to cater to (almost) every whim she has, makes us go along better but in the end only results in that the critisizing she does make is increasingly absurd. Today she felt like I should not wear a wollen sweater in winter, and that to wear one was a subtile critique of her home. I do think her issues are bigger than I ever imagined. I get mad she always kills the mood the last day over silly stuff like this. We need a better strategy.
 
Wearing a woolen sweater was a subtle critique of her home? Wow, that is freaky.
 
Thanks Kevin, ive met two, and while the sparks might not be huge, one of them is sweet enough. Another lives (bugger) 100 miles away .
 
kdt26417 said:
100 miles is quite a drive.
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That depends. I'd easily drive 100 miles. I used to do it for breakfast every weekend for years, and then moved further away (250 miles) and easily did that every second weekend.
 
A2Poly said:
That depends. I'd easily drive 100 miles. I used to do it for breakfast every weekend for years, and then moved further away (250 miles) and easily did that every second weekend.
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Agree!!!!!

The lady is loooovely, and if she would agree to that, i would do it ! i will try for a meetup next.
 
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